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We all get the feeling that someone just doesn’t like us. This might be just a feeling and sometimes, we are just overthinking about other’s behaviors. But if you find it obvious and keep wondering why don’t people like me, it’s worth addressing. Check some of the potential reasons right below with BestLifeTips.
How to know if someone hates you
Don’t get overwhelmed by the ideas of everyone hates you. If you think someone hates you, let’s get to know by psychological knowledge and examine the body language.
- Their body language says “no”.
It’s kind of clear if someone is willing to talk to you or not. Sometimes the body can’t tell a lie about what really going on inside. Open body language means they want to interact with you and welcome the conversation. They open their lives to let you in and accept you naturally. On the flip side, they show closed-off gestures and postures, that’s not a good sign. This might be crossed arms, leaning back from you or leaning toward the door when talking with you. All of that means one thing, they probably don’t want to talk with you much.
This simply means they may get defensive or not in the mood to talk with you, and this doesn’t necessarily mean they hate you.
- They go straight to the point and don’t want the conversation to go further.
This is an obvious sign that someone dislikes you. Trying asking them friendly questions about the weather, hobbies, friends or jobs and receive a short, cold answers or even “yes or no” ones is a reg flag.
When people dislike the person they’re chatting with, they won’t elaborate on their answers. If you like someone, you want to tell them what inspires you. You, too, can feel a surge of excitement at the prospect of talking with someone you enjoy being around. As a result, you’ll make it clear by frequently sharing what you appreciate or have in common and responding honestly.
- They look away from you.
When someone dislikes you, they may avoid making eye contact with you. This isn’t always the case, though. Some people are merely shy, while others have difficulty in social situations, while some simply dislike eye contact.
But there are times when this isn’t the case. When you know the person you’re talking to doesn’t generally avoid a long glance, it’s possible they’re avoiding your look because they don’t like you. They may not want to draw your attention because it would force them to speak with you.
- Or they stare at you.
Surprisingly, this is also a sign that they don’t like you much. It’s not always a good thing to have too much of anything. Some people may make excessive eye contact in order to express their defense. Too much eye contact can be a symptom that someone has a negative feeling towards you. This may sound confused but too much or too little eye contact means they don’t feel comfortable to talk with you.
- The conversation seems so forced.
Some people are just polite and don’t want to make anyone hurt. They may not let you know by facial expression or gestures or giving you cold response. But they have no motivation to go deeper into the conversation. It would be hard to make the talking flow and somehow you might feel awkward to communicate with them. In this case, it’s not clear if they hate you or just have difficulty in communication. Spending more time to get to know them is a wise move.
- They frequently check time.
Checking time frequently may mean that they are in a rush or need to follow a tight schedule. We cannot say someone hates us because they just keep checking on watch or smartphone. Be conscious about the sign because it means differently in different situations. But if they don’t want to extend the conversation and tend to check time more often, this may a sign that they are uninterested in talking with you.
How to know if someone hates you through text
Can we know if someone in distant hates us? The fact is that we can, but it really depends on the situation. Here are signs that they might don’t like you, but in any situations, don’t take it personally and don’t try to judge so quickly.
- It takes them a lot to reply.
Make sure that you don’t randomly send them a cute message and expect for an immediate reply. Be polite and respect their daily schedule as everyone has their own life. Especially, if they are working 9 to 5 or in an important stage of education, you can’t expect them for chit chat. Healthy people will try not to attach to phone all the time and most of the time, they will prefer a call or hang out than texting. However, if you always have to wait days to get a response, it means a totally different thing. But being uninterested and hate don’t mean the same. So don’t rush to conclude someone hates you just because of their delay responses.
- They give you short or one-word replies.
This can be a more obvious sign that they are not interested in texting with you. You probably take time for a hearty message but often receive a cold short reply from them? Take this a red flag. Besides, you seem to be the only one keeping the conversation going on.
- They avoid communication.
Not only romantic relationship but also friendship need the mutual interaction and frequent communication. They don’t want to face time or arrange to meet up? That’s a sign that they don’t appreciate the relationship that much and it’s time for you to take this into your consideration.
Why don’t people like me
Some people believe that the need to be liked equates to being shallow. Humans, on the other flip, are social creatures who crave the feeling of being supported and valued by people around us. Not everyone will like you, and it is something that every adult and functioning person should accept. The feeling that no one likes you, on the other hand, can be both disheartening and terrifying.
Here are some of the potential reasons that people don’t like you. Be open-minded and mature to look into your inner self to figure out what really is going on from inside. It’s good to know your worth, but it’s also worth trying to be a better version of yourself.
- You don’t like yourself.
So neither will people. Does this resonate to yourself? If you can’t accept yourself for who you are or always feel insecure to express your true self, what you give out to the world is your insecurity. Don’t seek the acceptance from the outside, accept yourself first and then the outer world will follow. It’s easy to see that we often chase an ideal image, which is called “trends” or “standards”, to get the acceptance or acknowledgement from the society. There is nothing wrong to look good or chase wealth but if only you find it sounds right to your core values. Don’t try to get fit in any communities and feel negativity about yourself for not fit in.
- You don’t appreciate the difference.
The thinking of “I’m never wrong” will spoil any relationships, friendship, colleagueship, romantic relationship, any interaction you have. You may have a higher education, get a higher paid jobs, gain higher achievement, but that doesn’t mean everyone has to go the same path with you. The difference makes the world beautiful and we can’t judge anyone from our own point of view. If you always try to “fix” anyone or give advice for “the better”, this may be a sign for you.
- You don’t let people in.
How people can like you if you don’t let them in? If you have a difficulty in communication, the best thing is to be genuine. It’s totally okay to be awkward at the first time, everyone is the same! Don’t make it too hard on yourself to show up.
- You are a drama queen/king.
Personal issues are unavoidable in everyone’s life. Life isn’t always what we want it to be, and even the toughest amongst us can be defeated from time to time. However, there is a narrow line between accepting the negative aspects of life and using them to define your existence.
You live as if you’re in a movie, or even worse, as if you’re the star of your own reality show. You exaggerate problems and create difficulties out of thin air. Even when there’s nothing to interpret, you take things seriously. No one wants to live their day-to-day life surrounded by people who want to make an issue out of everything, especially in a society when there is already so much negativity.
- You are too needy.
There’s nothing wrong with being emotionally reliant on your friends; we can’t always expect to be perfect, and we need confirmation from time to time that others care about and value us.
However, there is a thin line between need emotional support and being way too dependent. You should quit expecting everyone to come to your aid. You’ll have to cut back on the constant phone calls and texts.
If you go through life expecting everyone to abandon you, you won’t be surprised when they do. According to studies, narcissists are persons who are extremely needy. And it’s obvious that people dislike hanging out with narcissists.
- You keep spreading bad vibes.
Nobody wants to be your friend if you drag people down with you when you hold a pity party. So many of us now prioritize protecting our energy in this age of positivity and self-care, because once you start to slide down, it’s all too easy to go into a spiral.
And one of the worst things you can expose your energies to is someone who can’t stop complaining about everything.
Perhaps you grumble about how hot it is, or how bad the food is, or how dull the journey is, or how you can’t believe what others have done to you, or how everyone appears to be out to get you. Whether your complaints are about minor or major difficulties, the reality is that you are constantly complaining.
- You don’t care about your hygiene.
While it may appear to be a minor concern, it is likely to be just as significant as the other things on this list. Consider this: would you want to be around someone who constantly smells or appears unkempt?
It would not only damage your ability to enjoy your time with that individual, but it would also embarrass to be around someone who is so irresponsible with their beauty.
- You always talk behind others’ back.
We unintentionally learn as kids that gossip is one of the easiest ways to attract the attention of others around us, and we associate that behavior with pleasurable sensations.
We come to believe that gossiping — regardless of the consequences for others — is necessary for creating relationships. People eventually mature and realize how toxic it is to spread gossip in order to be the center of attention.
While you may gain their friendship in the short term, no one will want to connect with you because they will realize you will use them and their secrets to continue climbing the social ladder.
- You want others to follow.
Some people have a natural leadership skills. Others have a natural tendency to be bossy. You most likely consider yourself as the pack’s leader, with the obligation of guiding everyone in the right direction.
Sure, some of them have called you bossy, but you know deep down that you’re doing the right thing for everyone.
Your lack of control over your own life may be the source of your control issues.
It’s not easy to accept, but once you realize you’re your own greatest enemy, you’ll start to see the light and focus on your own flaws rather than pointing out others. You want to control your relationships because you’re afraid they won’t turn out the way you want them to without your guidance.
See more: How to get your friends to like you
Why don’t people like me-FAQ
- Why do I always feel everyone doesn’t like me?
Humans are social beings that have a strong need to belong. Some of us, though, are more aware of this need than others. If you have a strong need to be loved by everyone, you may be more sensitive to those who dislike you. If you believe this is the case for you, the greatest thing you can do is spend more time focused on what you’re doing and less time caring about what others think of you. After all, it’s more than likely that they don’t think about you as much as you believe. And that’s perfectly ok.
- What can I do to get out of that thought?
Social skill is the key. Be honest with yourself if you are trying enough with it or not. Besides, be patient with yourself and allow yourself to be vulnerable. In case you made every effort to socialize, celebrate for being brave enough to do so. Social skills, on the other hand, aren’t a one-size-fits-all skill. What may be considered good manners in one situation may not be appropriate in another.
Be mindful with the question “why don’t people like me” because it might become self-fulling. Because if you believe in something strongly enough, it will become true, not because the belief is true but because your actions on it change your actions and attitude. Be your authentic self and let people who actually don’t like you go. Return BestLifeTips often for more self-care tips.