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Being a second choice means making all of the first moves, and no matter what you do, it is never enough. However, are you stuck in this toxic relationship? BestLifeTips is here to share with you how to stop being the second choice in a relationship. Read on!
What does it mean to be the second choice in a relationship?
Being the second choice of someone means you need to put in the extra effort, but what value you get in return is just their alternative choice.
Being someone’s second choice means you will never be treated the way you deserve. They will never put you first. You are always the afterthought, and they would have no problem having you there.
So, do you think you should be the second choice in a relationship with someone?
Is it OK to be a second choice in a relationship?
Whatever situation you might be in at the moment, being the second choice in a relationship is never a good feeling.
Being with the person you love is such a great feeling, you may feel happy and satisfied for a while. However, that just happens for a short period of time. To tell the truth, it will never be enough to complete the whole inside you. Being the second choice in a relationship will not do you any good.
Maybe you are already in love with the wrong person and can not do anything to help yourself get over that situation, or even you still think that in the near future, you can touch him, then he can get away from his relationship and choose you instead.
However, is love like a competition where everyone is aiming for first place? Definitely not!
True love includes admiration, respect, care, and never subjecting their partner to hurt while being the second choice means that you are always disappointed.
So, it is absolutely not OK to be a second choice in a relationship. You can always be worth it to someone meant for you.
Signs to know if you’re the second choice in a relationship
Don’t you realize you’re becoming the second choice in a relationship? Read on the following 8 signs.
- It takes him ages to respond to you
Even if he is the one to initiate the conversation, it takes him a long time to respond to you. Sometimes, he must have seen your message right at the moment you send it, but he just chooses not to respond to it.
- He makes plans with you at the last second
Maybe his first priority is temporarily busy, or he just randomly wants to go out with you, and if you try to make plans with him in advance, he will tell you that he’s not sure if he’ll be available.
In general, most of your outings with that person are unplanned.
- He’s always late for every outing with you
The main point here is, he does whatever he wants without taking your feelings into consideration, and truly doesn’t respect your time.
- He downloads dating apps
He clearly is not convinced that you’re the right girl for him and always tries to look for other suitable opportunities. This proves you are just the second choice in a relationship.
- You are the only one making an effort in this relationship
You initiate almost every conversation, every dating suggestion, every hug. The only thing he ever initiates is sex.
- He doesn’t want to tell his friends about you
If he is not talking about you and even his friends still don’t know you exist. He does not care about you and your feeling. He’s not really serious in the relationship with you yet, and you are just the second choice in a relationship.
- They talk about another person
It shows that he not only lacks care for your feelings but also indicates that he is not completely focused on you.
- He constantly makes excuses
He constantly makes excuses for even the most basic mistakes. Maybe the reason why he doesn’t want to date or cancel plans is that he’s still screwed up from his first priority or he’s too busy with work, and you’re not worth his time.
Hurt and disappointment are feelings of someone who is the second choice in a relationship.
Why you should not settle for being the second choice in a relationship?
If you still don’t have any reason to get over someone who treats you as the second choice in a relationship, then you should read this part to make up your mind before it’s too late!
- You will always feel like you are not enough
Being the second choice in a relationship is hurt since you will always feel like something is missing in you that only other girls can fulfill. Everything that comes to you will not be as complete as his favorite person, which will create terrible feelings that you need more.
- You will become less confident
Being the second choice in a relationship leads to a lot of insecurities about your body and all your ways. You will always go to look at yourself in the mirror and wonder where you need to improve, then will always try to change the flaws you think of yourself. This is what makes you lose your inherent confidence. Don’t let anyone ruin your confidence by making you feel like you’re just second best.
- You are wasting your energy and time
Stop wasting your time and don’t wait for him to send you romantic texts while you are totally not his first choice. There will be no good results for you, so you should choose to undergo pain and find someone else who is more deserving of you instead.
Being the second choice in a relationship is so tough, so give it up if you truly love yourself.
Is it hard to stop being the second choice in a relationship?
No matter what the circumstance is, it is tough to stop being the second choice in a relationship. However, you deserve to be appreciated, not a good feeling to always be the one who is trying the hardest in a relationship. Therefore, do your best to get out of this toxic relationship as soon as possible.
How to stop being the second choice in a relationship?
These are the things you need to put in your mind when you want to stop being the second choice in a relationship:
- Always make yourself your number one priority
- Stop being available all the time
- Don’t hold on to a toxic relationship if you don’t want to waste your time and energy
- Stop being only a “cry shoulder”
- Let them contact you first
- Always looking for new and better relationships
- Share your true feelings with your soulmate and ask for advice
- How to get over someone who doesn’t like you
- How to get over a divorce you didn’t want
- How to get over a friend with benefits
Through this post, BestLifeTips hopes that you can find yourself a suitable answer for how to stop being the second choice in a relationship. If you have anything want to share, feel free to comment below. Don’t forget to follow BestLifeTips to see more interesting topics. Share this post if you find it interesting!