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Sometimes, a crush makes us confused and uncomfortable by sending us mixed signals. In this article, BestLifeTips will help you have a deeper look at getting mixed signals from a crush and how to deal with it.
What are mixed signals?
According to Shirani Pathak, LCSW, a relationship counselor, holistic psychotherapist, and founder of the Center for Soulful Relationships, “Mixed signals are when someone’s being inconsistent in the messages they’re giving people.”
Mixed signals can simply be miscommunication. Your partner tries to express one set of feelings, and it comes out wrong.
They can also be intentional.
“Mixed signals are when someone’s being inconsistent in the messages they’re giving people.”, Shirani Pathak says.
Sending and getting mixed signals can occur at any point in a relationship.
No matter when or where mixed signals happen, they can be equal parts confusing and frustrating, especially if you really like the person.
So what to do when you’re getting mixed signals from a crush? Keep reading to find out!
Why do mixed signals in relationship happen?
If a person is giving mixed signals, it’s usually a sign they’re dealing with their own internal conflict.
Mixed signals are not signs that you need to change, but the person sending the signals has some inner work to do.
Mixed signals can also be the result of an avoidant attachment style, which means they tend to pull away when a relationship becomes intimate, since the feelings of closeness make them nervous.
Are mixed signals a good thing?
Mixed signals can simply be a miscommunication, or they can be an excuse to hold you at arm’s length because they don’t want to commit.
Mixed signals can definitely mean that the other person isn’t going all in on you, but that’s not the only answer at play.
They may also mean that the person is having an inner conflict when they’re not sure about their feelings for you.
They don’t know whether they like you as a lover or as a good friend. And they send mixed signals to you unintentionally before determining what they feel for you.
Mixed signals at the early of a relationship are signs showing that someone wants to get to know more about the other.
Regardless of whether they’re good or bad, they can make you feel confused. You may find yourself feeling frustrated. You don’t know whether you are reading the relationship right.
How can you tell if someone is sending mixed signals?
Here are signs someone is giving mixed signals to you:
This is one of the biggest signs that you’re fielding mixed signals. You may even start questioning your own judgment.
You don’t get that call when you expect to
If you send the message and they don’t reply, you’re allowed to feel a little off about it. Maybe they don’t follow up days after a great date, or they only text you when it’s convenient for them. It’s shorthand for they’re not totally invested in you.
A person’s actions don’t match their words
People who give mixed signals might say that you’re important to them, but their behavior doesn’t match up.
For example, they tell you they want to be with you, but not actually making the time to do it.
They won’t open up, but they expect you to
A successful relationship requires an emotional connection, and being vulnerable is key to building a path toward that.
If you’re the only one expressing your true self, then that’s not a healthy relationship.
They flirt with other people
It’s confusing to know if someone is actually interested in you or wants you around in case other options don’t work out.
See if they’re defensive or if they try to understand you. They might not be ready for exclusivity, but if they’re really into you, they shouldn’t have any behaviors that make you uncomfortable.
They won’t show affection in public but have no problem doing so when you’re alone
Sometimes it can take time to get comfortable enough in the relationship to be that open about it.
However, not acting like you’re together at all in public can also make you feel like the person is hot and cold or doesn’t want to be seen with you.
You’re not sure how to interact with them
Being unsure of where things stand in a relationship can make it hard to know how to communicate with someone.
Keep reading the article to see what to do when getting mixed signals from a crush.
How do I stop getting mixed signals from a crush?
So what should you do if you’re getting mixed signals from your crush? Take a look at the following steps to see whether they can help you.
Are you misreading the signs?
The first thing you need to do before trying to stop getting mixed signals from a crush is to determine your understanding.
If a girl smiles at a guy or talks sweetly with him, he may think that she’s sexually interested in him.
On the other hand, if a guy talks sweetly with a girl, she may assume that he wants to get into a relationship with her.
Make sure you’re reading the signs properly or you may end up looking foolish. Don’t let emotions cloud your mind.
This is the first step to stop getting mixed signals from a crush.
Your crush is trying to glance at you now and then, but then they completely avoid looking at you some other time? Or do they like flirt with you like they’re already in love with you and then talk to you like just another friend the next morning?
Relax. You know something is up. Just enjoy the game and look for moments to get flirty again.
Challenge the game
The next step to stop getting mixed signals from a crush is to try to take control of the game. When your crush tries to flirt with you or tries making eye contact, ignore them.
Let them know that you’re not a puppet and you can play the game, too. They may ignore you for a day or two, but they’ll start sending out mixed signals before the end of the week.
By switching the control of the game now and then, you’ll make your crush try to win your affection too.
Don’t burst out
You may be frustrated by mixed signals, but don’t ever burst out or confront your crush.
They may be sending mixed signals, but you have no idea if this person actually likes you.
Bursting out or forcing an answer out of this person will end up losing any chance of getting into a relationship with them.
Don’t fall for this person just yet
Another way to stop getting mixed signals from a crush is not to fall head over heels in love with them yet.
The exchanging of mixed signals could just be a silly game to pass the time. You don’t know if this person likes you for sure.
Learn from it
There are times when your crush likes you a lot and other times when they don’t like you back.
Mixed signals are a confusion. But people give out mixed signals when they’re not sure about whether they want to date you or not.
Whenever you’re with your crush, try to charm this person and make them like you more.
Don’t tell anyone else about it
Mixed signals are like secret games. You shouldn’t tell anyone else about it.
If anyone else talks about it, you’ll end up bringing it out into the open. And when that happens, your crush has to decide at once whether they want to date you or not.
And when they’re giving you mixed signals, they’re probably going to walk away from you.
At the same time, spreading this may annoy your crush and you may just end up embarrassing yourself if no one believes you.
Take a decision
There may be many reasons behind why you’re getting mixed signals from a crush, no matter what you do to impress them.
They may already be dating someone else or may be interested in someone else at the same time; they probably don’t think you’re good enough to date; their friends don’t approve of you, and so on.
If your crush stops giving out mixed signals, good for you. On the other hand, if it’s not working out in your favor, forget about it instead of breaking your head over it.
- How to tell someone you’re not interested after leading them on
- How to know if you’re being used
- I don’t know what I want in a relationship
This is all about getting mixed signals from a crush that BestLifeTips want to share with you. Leave a comment below if you want to share your story and how you get over it.